Burnout: help yourself by helping others

I recently listened to the podcast  Het Kwartier and I was struck by a painful reality: the number of young people between 18 and 34 years old who are at home with a burnout has more than doubled in four years. These are staggering figures. It is a phenomenon that we can no longer ignore and that affects all layers of the population. Even Mathias De Clercq, the mayor of the city of Ghent, recently stated in  De Standaard admitted that he seriously considered quitting. He hit his limits, despite loving his job.

It made me think. Not only as a business leader who sees how high the bar is, but also as a religious person. Because how do we deal with that pressure in a world that never stands still? And is the standard solution that the world offers us complete?

The perfect storm: everything is possible, so everything must be done

In the podcast, the finger was put on the sore spot. We grew up with the idea that everything is possible. The world is at our feet, plane tickets are cheap, the internet broadens our view. But the flip side of that coin is merciless: if everything  is possible, you quickly get the feeling that everything also  must be done.

We don't just want to score professionally. We also want to be the perfect parent, have a rich social life, achieve sports goals that look good on Strava, and have culinary lunches in between – as long as it's “Instagrammable”. We drown in the possibilities. The result is what psychologists call “self-critical perfectionism”. We constantly ask ourselves: “Am I good enough?”.

And when the lights go out – when we mentally and physically crash – we often get the same advice: “Take time for yourself.” “Put yourself first.” “Be kind to yourself”. Don't get me wrong: that is absolutely true. If your leg is broken, you need to rest. If your spirit is broken, that rest and professional guidance are just as necessary..

A spiritual paradox

Yet something gnaws at me about that one-sided focus on ‘self-care’. In our modern psychology, the ‘self’ is central to recovery. We must guard our boundaries, shield ourselves, and focus on our own needs. But from my faith as a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I believe there is another dimension. A spiritual dimension that is often overlooked but can be a powerful antidote to the rat race.

There is indeed a great danger in focusing too much on yourself: you keep going in circles in your own head. Your own problems, your own shortcomings, and your own stress remain the center of your universe.

There is an old Christian principle that is at odds with our current zeitgeist, but that in practice has a miraculous healing effect:  finding yourself by losing yourself in the care of another.

The power of 'ministering'

Within our faith community, we know the concept of 'ministering' (or  ministering). For someone unfamiliar with our church, that might sound like a heavy, theological word, or an administrative task. But the essence is beautiful and, I think, more relevant than ever.

Ministering is not just “doing something good for a neighbor”. It is a fundamental attitude towards life in which you consciously look after the people around you, as Jesus Christ did. It's not about ticking off a visit. It's about genuine interest: “I see you. I see your needs. I am here for you.”

Why does this help against burnout? Because serving radically shifts your perspective. When you actively commit yourself to someone else – visiting a sick person, offering a listening ear to someone lonely, or simply doing a practical chore for a young family – something happens in your brain and in your soul. You step out of the tunnel vision of your own stress. The constant internal dialogue of “should” and “perform” falls silent for a moment, because your focus has shifted to the other.

Out of the rat race, into the community

Spiritually, I believe God made us this way. We are not made to strive for first place as isolated individuals. We are made for connection.

In our church community, we try to be that safety net. Ministry ensures that no one is invisible. It creates a culture where it's okay not to be strong for a while, because you know there are others who will 'minister' for you if you can't.

• It shifts the focus away from  status (what have I achieved?) to  meaning (what have I meant to another?).
• It replaces fleeting social media likes with deep, human connection.

Of course, this is not a magic solution. Being a member of a church does not make you immune to the pressures of society. Even in our church pews, there are people who struggle, who are exhausted, who feel they are failing. We too must be wary of the pitfall of seeing 'ministry' as just another task that 'must' be done and in which we 'must' be 'perfect'.

A new way to recharge

But I am convinced that the active practice of charity is an essential key to lasting happiness. It is a way to recharge that is not passive (like lying on the couch), but active and meaningful.

If you feel stuck, the reflex is often to withdraw. Try, however small, the opposite. Look around you. Who needs help? By helping others, you often unconsciously heal a part of yourself.

Perhaps that is the ultimate spiritual lesson for our time: the way out of burnout is not only a way inward, but also a way outward. Towards others.